Well I’m back – We spent several fun filled days in sunny, and at times rainy, Jamaica. Yes we did get married with no drama or difficulties – past the initial departure drama *see below – if there were any other dramas they were kept far from the brides eyes and I thank my family for sparing my any anguish if there was any. But from the sounds of peoples responses when we got back every one had a great time.
DAY 0:
Last day of packing. Got no rest didn’t go to bed – had to leave for the airport at 3am so what would have been the point of sleeping? We were picked up at home and driven to the airport and dropped off our family – we took separate flights and headed to our terminal. Mean while back with my family – my brother tried to fly with an expired drivers license and failed- he was turned away at the gate – effectively causing the biggest wrinkle in the whole weekend, probably more so for him than for anybody else- how would you feel if you shot a perfectly good trip in the foot and got no refund? Anyway barring his drama everyone arrived safely in JA – my family used my child to bypass the two our customs wait- we didn’t have the child so we waited through the two hour customs rigmarole. Took a long scenic bus ride – saw lots of goats and very few cows –made me a little suspect about the red hamburgers.
DAY 1:
Checked in to the resort – 1st impressions were a little scary – looked like Chicago ghettos or the ghetto building from New Jack City – at least from the outside when we arrived most of our family was in the lobby mobbing the bar in their respective beach wear – yes people it was gonna be that kind of trip. Free liquor and fun for every one. They brought us drinks and we checked in and I went to check on the child and everyone’s rooms, we had a few air conditioning issues to address and by the time I made it back to the lobby- Jerry had begun the Mai Tai odyssey. He was working his way through a 32oz Mai-Tai and was pretty happy about it. He introduced me to his new friend Justin who had just gotten married (beautiful couple from Dallas – big ups to Rachel!!) and they went off to be boys and do what boys do when they have access to copious amounts of free liquor – DRINK HAPPILY! Ironically we didn’t see each other much until dinner when J, and Tambora and Justin (our Justin not the one from Dallas) were completely intoxicated, correction INTOX (hiccup) ICATED, by dinner. We had a pretty good Jerk pork /Chicken and fish combo – and I was entertained by stories of my future husbands drunken escapades. My aunt and God sister were eaten alive by mosquitoes – which turned out to be a continuing phenomenon during our evenings in paradise. Although a different person would get targeted – although never the Groom or my uncle – lucky bastards.
DAY 2:
Friday we spent the day in pools and on the beach – We met my sisters in laws (remember Peet?) That all worked out for the best since my brother was no longer there they stayed my with mom and my sister in the extra room there. Big up to Winston for hooking that up for us. If you are ever at the Starfish Trelawney Resort and need anything ask Winston – he can make anything happen – he is the man. Anyway we all did separate things there were drinking games – lots of drinking with out games and pool time with my daughter – who by the way turned out to be a water sprite and loves pools and the ocean – although at first she looked at the ocean like “that pool is too big!” Who knew you could get fabu Sushi in Jamacia – seeing as its an Island I don’t know why I was so surprised but it was really good.
My mom had Jamaican friends who we were supposed to go out with but I wanted to rest before my wedding so I didn’t go – my cousin turned out to be a punk who couldn’t hang with the locals so that night of partying was cut short – Glad I didn’t go cause I would have been hot.
DAY 3;
Wedding day – I woke up early and went to spend some time in prayer on the beach – alone. Ate breakfast alone, enjoyed the scenery before I went to my granny’s room and spent the morning with my kid and did her hair – or rather took it down from the zillion braids she’d been subjected to. Then I went to find my sister and my mom – had a spa treatment (seaweed wrap that didn’t feel like seaweed- I mean who uses a powered seaweed when you got TONS of the crap in your back yard?) and a manicure that wasn’t work the money cause I didn’t have time to let it dry. Bumped into the groom twice – throwing the you can’t see each other thing right out the window.
All in all the wedding was exactly what I wanted, very quick and to the point – as fuss free as it can be when you bring your mother and other female relatives with you. Our officiate had the funniest little accent and my favorite part was when he said “love HERRRR, honor HERRRRR…” it took all my strength not to laugh – I’m looking down in the DVD as not to crack up in his face.
Anyway we were married – My girl Pat from the LOU (actually born and grown in JA) showed up – then we lost her to security – we ate cake and were back into the pool within a hour and a half. We spent the rest of the day frolicking on the beach – The boys did Jet skis and kayaks and stuff, my mom and granny did windsailing, Cousin John –the wussy party mon and Eshon did every water sport available. We were supposed to go out but jerry and I got a little side tracked after dinner and no one called us to advise us the time – not wanting to disturb the newlyweds who actually wanted to be disturbed – the lights went off a couple of times so all of our clocks were flashing 12:00 and we had no idea of the time… makes everything better doesn’t it? when you don’t know when you started or stopped? Anyway – we heard about some minor firecrackers on that trip – it didn’t work out quite the way we had hoped, more party poopers, folks who can’t hang. You know you should know what kind of vacationer you are – if you’re are a resort vacationer STAY ON THE RESORT, if you can kick it with out reservations and can trust your locals – then venture out. That’s another blog for another day. Anyway we spent the rest of the night.. well you all don’t need those details.
Day 4:
Sunday: very low key day. I spent the day talking to my mom, we spent some time – not a whole lot but enough I hope to make her trip a bit better- he took it personally when her Jamaican friends were snubbed by members of our group- that previous statement about staying on resort was for them. I’d really like to go kick it with my mom – I so wish they had called our room so I could go. anyway – we talked and walked the beach awhile, picked out the pictures from the photographer with her, Played with Cammy and her for awhile then spent some time hanging with the gang, Jerry played poker with my dad during the resorts poker night, and smoked a Cuban cigar – I’ve never known Jerry to smoke anything so that was interesting. I spent some time with my baby girl since I knew she was leaving the next day, she and I called it an early night and played in the hotel room for a while to give my grannies a night to enjoy the resort.
DAY 5:
Monday : SWITCH! Everyone packed and got ready to go. I cried when they took my baby – I think they took bets to see if I would. I had a bit of a time arranging delivery of the DVD but that eventually worked out although the DVD received was WHACKED – do I look like Celine Dion and Shania Twain to you? That’s all I’m saying about that.
We switched to a new resort and paid too much for the car trip there, and found a lovely paradise to start our honeymoon at. BEAUTIFUL resort –Grand Lido Negril.
My fingers are tired and I’ll write part two about the trip tomorrow!! Stay up MON!!
